


31/05/2005

by Holo_Bayliss



Series: a life well lived [1]
Category: Kingsman: The Secret Service (2015)
Genre: Cracky, Mission Fic, Other, Weirdness, lancelot's name is James Spencer
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-31
Updated: 2015-05-31
Packaged: 2018-04-02 02:49:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 804
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4042912
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Holo_Bayliss/pseuds/Holo_Bayliss
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>I don't know... a mission...</p>
            </blockquote>





	31/05/2005

**Author's Note:**

> This fic is totally for me...   
> Happy 39th Birthday me.

31/05/2005

James Spencer stared out into the room before him. The blood of his enemies painting the floor in front of him. Hearing the slide of Oxfords barreling behind him he braced for the sudden impact of the agent against his back. Kay's hands came up and smacked into the middle of his back as she stopped against him. 

“Merlin, where is he?” Kay spoke carefully as she surveyed the destruction in front of them. “I'm not seeing anything but Lancelot's mess here.” 

“Yeah, Merlin, where's Galahad?” James asked as well. He was scanning the walls, looking for any anomaly in the structure of the caverns walls, “We need to find him because he has Kay's birthday present.” He continued to study the room. 

Kay coughed behind him and glared slightly. 

“Down the hall and to the left then turn right at the second intersection. Third door down.” Merlin tacked on, “Hurry, because I don't like the looks of the feed.” 

The feed was showing a rather unpleasant man strapping Harry to a contraption that had a large blade not too far from his body. Harry was calmly trying to talk the man out of strapping him to the machine, letting him know that if he would just let Harry go, he would help him in anyway he could and that this was just a simple misunderstanding between two crazy megalomaniacs. 

The man was laughing manically and continuing to strap Harry down. Harry's feed shook. 

The man laughed as he escaped through a door far from the machine as it started with an audible thump. 

“Harry look up for me.” Merlin asked. 

Harry's feed worked it's way to the ceiling and a gasp escaped. “The fuck?”

Merlin swallowed and spoke, “Lancelot. Kay. You need to hurry. This man is fucking crazy.” 

Harry suddenly started praying loudly, “ _Our Father who art in Heaven, Hallowed be thy name; Thy kingdom come Thy will be done On earth as it is in heaven. Give us this day our daily bread; And forgive us our trespasses As we forgive those who trespass against us; And lead us not into temptation, But deliver us from evil. Amen!_ Fuck, MERLIN! _Hail Mary, full of grace, the Lord is with thee: blessed art thou among women, and blessed is the fruit of thy womb, Jesus. Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners, now and at the hour of our death. Amen!_ Tell them to fucking hurry, again, please.” He watched as the blade swung wide and clicked down a notch. He struggled against the straps holding him down. He would have to be captured by a guy obsessed with Edgar Allen Poe. 

James barreled down the hall as Kay followed and continued to watch his six. They were both shooting anything that popped out of the cavern's hallways. When they got to the door, they could hear Harry still praying loudly and begging for Merlin to get help there quickly, but they also heard the steady _Whoosh_ of something moving almost terrifyingly slow. They heard an audible _Clunk_ then a terrified sound. 

James glared at the keypad in front of him, “Merlin, can I just fucking shoot this thing?” 

Kay pulled out her lighter grenade, “Or maybe we can just blow the fucking door off.” 

Merlin spoke, his voice deepening, “Or you could just enter in _215798_ on the keypad.”

James entered the number on the keypad and the door clicked open. 

Kay let out a gasp that sounded more wounded then anything else. Harry looked toward the door and struggled more. James raised his gun and shot at the metal buckles holding the leather straps that held Harry to the table he was on. 

The blade _whooshed_ over Harry's body then on the upswing Harry rolled over on to the floor and struggled with the other straps. Kay bolted across the room and helped him unhook his ankle from the strap. His leg and arm hit the floor next to the table as the blade dropped and fell into the middle of it. 

Kay ran her hands over Harry and mumbled, “If you ever deviate from the plan of attack again I will fucking personally kill you.” 

Harry was mumbling back, “I'm sorry, Kay. I'm sorry, I'm alright, no really, just scared. I am fine.”

James smiled, “Where the bastard go, Merlin? I think my girlfriend will take good care of my boyfriend.”

Merlin sighed, “Out the back door over there. Please try and not blow up the cave.” 

Kay pulled Harry off the floor and checked him over again, handed him a spare gun, and pushed him to follow James out the door. 

If when they got out of the cave, they kind of blew it up for Kay's birthday, that's nobodies business but their's.


End file.
